Church Entertainment

December 3, 2007

We go to a wonderful, large-homeschooled-family church that seeks to integrate children of all ages into the worship service. I say “seeks” because it is not always a quiet experience or hugely successful venture for our family. In fact, between the talking babies, squirming toddlers, the whispered instructions of parents to children, and an occasional older person wondering out loud where the pickles are, most people would find it distracting. I think it’s a cool idea, and enjoy having all the children around, and the knowledge that no one really minds the noise too much because they know what it means…..children are being taught to sit respectfully, sing hymns joyfully, and experience people of all ages worshipping God.

The actual training is a killer, though. It’s kinda like the vacation experience of sitting for 18 hours in a van with a crying baby, and eventually finding it entirely necessary and perfectly natural to remove the cigarette lighter from the charger and give it to the baby to suck on.

Case in point…… Today, our 2-year-old sat still with zero entertainment for 13 seconds of the service. She then moved on to flipping pages in the hymnbook for an incredible amount of time for a child of her age and emotional make-up. Then she knelt on the floor for awhile, peeking through the chairs in front of her to see what she could see. Next came poking her fingers through the slits in the same chairs, meeting with various church members’ backsides before being noticed and removed. The last thing with which she amused herself was this…… Kneeling on the floor of every member of our family, stroking each shoe one by one, and squeezing each foot in turn to apparently determine the size, width, and girth.

Yes, she’s an unusual child. But in another 2 years or so, she’ll be sitting quietly in church, probably taking notes on the theology derived from the day’s sermon, and wondering why her freaky little brother is amusing himself by licking the carpet.

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3 Responses to “Church Entertainment”

  1. Marie said

    I love the idea of including my children in things like our small group, our church service, etc. But then when it’s actually attempted, I realize why they invented nurseries and children’s programs and babysitters. It is difficult and distracting and noisy. But I love the early development of the ability to sit still and listen. I think it’s worth it. At least sometimes. (=

  2. trish said

    Hi! I sub to your blog thru bloglines and laugh out loud most days as I read it! I do have a word of caution for you though. Little girls who do this kind of thing in church grow up to be teenaged girls with shoe obsessions and broken ankles. Or maybe I just read that on my blog?
    Either way thanks so much for a good laugh today! Have a blessed day!
    http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/MamaBugs

  3. Anonymous said

    Well, at least she was quite! 🙂

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