The Things I Suffer Through

June 14, 2008

I have had 11 pregnancies.  That’s “morning sickness” 11 times. 

I have 9 living children.  That’s nine times of pushing human beings out of my body, sometimes in locations that you wouldn’t normally think babies should be born into. 

I homeschool the ones that are old enough to be “schooled”.  Which means that……….

I am with my 9 children 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.  I don’t do MOPS, Mother’s Day Out, or even homeschool co-op types of activities.  Which means that…….again……I am with my 9 children 24/7.

My main (and most excruciating) job is character development/training.  Of 9 children. 

Have I mentioned that I have 9 children?  As in, one less than 10?

Okay.  Just checking.

I know how to cook obscene amounts of food.  Before I had “Juan” (Heather, you win), I pre-made 68 meals and put them in the freezer.  While very pregnant.  And sweaty.

I have 3 children in diapers.  One is potty-training as I type, but I have had a NUMBER of times in the last 13 years when I have had 3 children in diapers.

I change diapers.  A LOT.

I am in charge of maintaining a household in which 9 children live, work, and play 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

Do you KNOW how many meals that is?  Do you KNOW how many packages of socks and underwear that is?  Do you KNOW how many times a day I say, “Stop being a bully to your sister!” and “We do NOT eat out of the trash can!” and “Stop sniffing each others’ bottoms!”

(And just for the record, all of the above utterances HAVE come out of my mouth at some time or other in the past.)

Here is where all of this is leading……

Yesterday, I asked one of my children, who shall remain nameless, to run upstairs to get me something.  This child is normally not a problem, but please keep in mind that he was watching “Curious George” so the interruption was a horrific event in his day.  And you should know that this was an “extra” request, which means that it was not on any chore chart that included his name.  This was something more than is “required” of him, and it did not sit well with him at this particular moment in time, apparently.  Because he said this to me……..

“Why do WE have to do all the work around here?  YOU don’t seem to do ANY work!  I just want to go live with another family!”

And so I spent the next 30 minutes telling him the things that I do on a daily basis that make his life NOT stink.  That allow him to be able to eat on a regular basis, learn how to function in a society that requires one to actually WORK for a living, have the training he needs to NOT end up in a large facility that requires him to sleep behind bars and constantina wire.  You get the idea.

There were other, various and sundry items that were discussed with him also, involving other families and attitudes and respect of parents. 

Basically?  By the time I was done with him, he was rethinking his particular stance on assisting me when I ask for it. 

And when I had finished reminding him who is the female parent around here and who is the child, he had a sheepish grin on his face and the gall to ask me what was for supper.

All I’m sayin’ is…..It’s a good thing he’s so cute!



3 Responses to “The Things I Suffer Through”

  1. Mindy said

    This has SO happened to me. More than once, a child around here has dared to utter something like, “What exactly are YOU going to do while we’re WORKING?” And they received pretty much the same speech that you described. AFTER I was done reading The Enquirer and eating my truffles.

  2. Susan said

    I am so glad that we are not the only family who uses are children as slaves (HA HA HA). This is what they think and sometimes I believe they think we are the only parents who make their children actually learn how to function in life.

  3. Steph said

    Whew!! I am SO glad I’m not the only one this happens to…I was beginning to think I must not be deserving of a large family…we hear the same tales here. =)

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