A Sad, Pathetic Post in Which I Feel Sorry For Myself and Ask You to Do the Same

June 27, 2008

I have noticed lately that when I don’t write a post every day or so, my stats go down considerably.

That makes me sad.

It SHOULDN’T, because I’m not doing this for the stats, but it does.  I am mentally flung back to my high school years, where no one liked me and everyone made fun of me and I was skinny and had buck teeth and big glasses and humongous feet, and you couldn’t PAY anyone to be my friend because I was just too huge of a dork.

That’s how I feel right now.  Like, am I boring now?  Has my writing gone downhill so that you can barely stand to read my posts?  Is the whole 9-kids thing kinda getting to you?  What?

But wait.

I don’t know that I REALLY want to know, because then I’ll be flung back to my high school years where no one liked me and everyone made fun of me and I was skinny and had buck teeth and big glasses and humongous feet and you couldn’t PAY anyone to be my friend because I was just too huge of a dork.

So I’m going to go with this…..

1.  Maybe some of you are on vacation, and riding the rides at Disney World with your children is more important than reading my blog.  (Snort!)

2.  I’ve been busy getting our 2500-square-foot house streamlined enough to fit into a 1200-square-foot house and haven’t been able to write much.  Because the whittling down of stuff is painful and time-consuming.  Feel sorry for me.

If there is something else I should know, please be kind.  I guess I would want to know if people who are obligated to read my blog now do so with dread and resigned sighing.  And if you’re NOT obligated to read my blog, but just actually ENJOY it, that would be cool to know too.  Not that I need your validation or anything.

Okay, maybe I do.

Because last night?  I got very close to crying when my husband called me out to the front porch to see the lightning bugs out in the field in front of our house, and listen to the frogs singing down at the creek, and just generally notice the lack of people-noises that we will SO miss when we move to Arizona.

Where it’s hot.

So I think I’m feeling a tab bit needy and vulnerable. 

And Yummy Man doesn’t really DO needy and vulnerable well.  He just sighs and rolls his eyes and tells me how much of a chick I’m being and can I please stop that because it’s just annoying already.

And now I’m going to have to cry.

(This isn’t helping my stats, is it?)

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10 Responses to “A Sad, Pathetic Post in Which I Feel Sorry For Myself and Ask You to Do the Same”

  1. Happy Geek said

    “I am mentally flung back to my high school years, where no one liked me and everyone made fun of me and I was skinny and had buck teeth and big glasses and humongous feet, and you couldn’t PAY anyone to be my friend because I was just too huge of a dork.”
    OK, you just described junior high for me, except for the big feet part (I’m just freakishly small all over) which is why I do not follow my stats.
    I hated junior high. Don’t want to go back. Anything that reminds me of it is instantly banished from my life.
    In this house I am still quite cool (my kids are too young to know different) and I am going to ride this pony till the legs fall off.
    Allison, I can only follow about 20 blogs (and even then I have to cut some out, since my kids need to eat, learn and wear clothes) but yours is one I just wouldn’t cut out.
    You are hysterically funny, real and helped change my (incorrect) perception of people who have larger families.
    Often times things you have said will resonate with me for weeks.
    One of my biggest encourgements was when your daughter pitched that enormous fit in your driveway. Whenever my kdis are misbehaving and all my training is not working I just remind myself that even supermom Allison had days like this.
    YOu rock.
    Happy purging.
    Have a great weekend.
    I really need to stop and feed my kids.
    So I will.

  2. Trinka said

    Hey! So what you’re saying is skinny kids were ostracized too, along with us fat kids? So who WAS “inside” the whole school-thing? Nobody? 🙂

    I’m still reading. I love your blog.

    And it will get better. It will! There will be good things in Arizona. God will show Himself in new ways. The kids will learn new things. There will be ministry opportunities in a different church, with different needs. You’re being planted there because God will use you there in delightful ways.

    Change is awful. I hate it. But God seems to like it, and in the end, makes it a glorious thing.

    But did you know it’s really hot there?

    Trinka

  3. Mindy said

    I don’t know if I count as someone obligated to read your blog, but I LOVE reading it! I check it several times every day, just to see if you’ve posted something new. Even my older kids gather around and ask what you’ve written today. I even talk to my mom about what you blog! It is a welcome and looked-forward-to oasis in the middle of my busy day!
    But you know what–I agree with Happy Geek: STOP FOLLOWING YOUR STATS!!! Like you said, that’s NOT why you do this, so don’t give yourself something else to worry about. :o)

  4. Heather said

    Cheer up. Your blog is still the BEST! I check it EVERY day. SEVERAL times a day. So I don’t miss anything. Your blog is one of the first ones I visit. It always starts my morning out with a laugh or a smile……..especially when you concede to calling the latest olive plant Juan and tell me that I win….ahhhh. Music to my ears!
    😉

  5. Susan F. said

    Hi Allison!

    I am Susan Jensen’s Arizona friend. First of all, I want to tell you how much I enjoy reading your blogs!!! God has blessed you with a wonderful sense of humor and outlook on life! Thank you for “counting it all joy” and sharing with us!

    I am writing you to help you see the positive side of your adventure to Arizona. You will be moving when it is hot, yes, but you should also still get to experience the wonders of the monsoon season. I grew up near Tucson and still have mine and my husband’s family there. The Tucson monsoons are some of the most amazing works of God through nature!! Have you ever seen the Arizona Highways magazines with all the spectacular pictures of lightning shows? It is better than any Fourth of July fireworks show you have ever seen! You are surrounded by 4 beautiful mountain ranges in Tucson and when the weather from all 4 sides collide, you get the monsoon spectacular! I must also add that I have yet to see any sunset as beautiful as an Arizona sunset! As outdoor types, you will have so much to explore! The mountains, and some great mountain preserves; caves and caverns to see; cooler climates (Mount Lemmon) just a few minutes away; working mines to visit and study; new wildlife and critters to explore and enjoy! Those are just a few of the things I can think of. It really is a great place to live! (As for the house situation, I wish I could be a bit more encouraging there, but am at a loss for words in that situation). You will not have to scrape ice or shovel snow in the winter – just enjoy the cool outdoors!

    I am praying for a smooth moving experience and settling for you and your family.

  6. Joanna said

    How sad. About the fireflies and the quiet and the move to someplace not so quiet and serene…and really hot. And currently on FIRE.

    If it makes you feel any better, I check your blog no less than twice a day. Because you’re funny and I’m anxiously awaiting the next fabulous recipe. And because I’m suck in a 1200 sq. ft. apartment, pregnant with four daughters and no friends. Isn’t that sad. But don’t feel sorry for me. I do feel bad for you though. I don’t know what you’re going to do with 9 kids in that tiny place. I am SHOCKED that they can’t cough up a *slightly* larger place than that to abode you in. I wonder in advance what it is that God expects us to learn from situations like this, all the while knowing that it’s not until the situation is over that I can look and see what it is that I’ve learned.

    What do you make your kids for breakfast every day? I usually serve my kids cereal. Pretty exciting, eh? But sometimes I think I should be making them bacon and eggs every morning. Or at least oatmeal and biscuits. Or maybe waffles and sausage.

    Oh, and I’D be weepy and emotional and irrational if I were about to go through as many drastic changes as you are about to go through.

  7. Kelly said

    KEEP BLOGGING!
    I NEED YOU!
    I NEED TO LAUGH!
    I NEED TO RELATE!
    I NEED TO SMILE!
    I NEED TO BE REMINDED THAT BIG FAMILYS ROCK! (and homeschoolers too!)

    am I clear?

    🙂

    May blessings shower over you as your blog/book does to me!

  8. Heather said

    I found your blog thru a friend of mine about 2 months ago. LOVE it! I don’t get to get on here tho more then once or twice a week-darn work cuts into my computer time. I look forward to following your move to AZ!

  9. Johanna said

    So I know this comment is late, and maybe you won’t even notice it, but I actually was on vacation and paying attention to my kids this last week! And the week before that working VBS at my church. But when those things are not going on, I check your blog – and love it – every day. I’m glad you got encouragement before I got here to give it to you, too!

  10. Zum said

    I’m like Mindy = I check 2 – 3 times a day to see if you’ve posted anything new. HAVE to read it? NO WAY!!!!! WANT to read it? YOU BET!!!! Keep goin’!

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