Please Forgive Us. We’re Country Folk.

January 13, 2009

To the fellow members of our church congregation,

My apologies to you all for the questionable behavior of our 6-year-old this past Saturday night service.  (Which is when we have our church services.  It’s an Arizona thing.)

Really, it’s not my fault because I was in the nursery with the two smallest children and Yummy Man was in charge of the oldest seven kids’ church behavior.

So it’s HIS fault.

Here is what happened, as told to me by Yummy Man himself……..

Six-Year-Old was having trouble dealing with her physical discomfort.  Apparently, whenever the singing is over and the pastor begins his sermon, her body temperature rises to a level that is dangerously close to spontaneous combustion.

And apparently whining and squirming and making hang-dog faces at Daddy relieves her discomfort.  Yummy Man gave her The Look a few times and motioned authoritatively other times and then he didn’t notice her for awhile.  When he looked back, he told me he saw this……

A pile of socks and leggings on the floor near her chair, and her sitting bare-legged and spread-eagle in her chair, panting.

And she had a hard time figuring out why this was unacceptable behavior in a church setting.

So anyone who was privy to this display of 6-year-old angst, not to mention SKIN, please be advised that this child is one-of-a-kind.

A drama queen of the highest order.

And this is supposed to excuse her behavior in your mind, ‘kay?

Thank you for your understanding.  We will attempt to keep our children clothed from now on during the church service.

But remember.  We’ve got nine and sometimes we just don’t notice this stuff.  Especially since, a mere 6 months ago, we lived out in the middle of nowhere and actually encouraged naked-ness because it cut down on laundry.

Is that bad?


4 Responses to “Please Forgive Us. We’re Country Folk.”

  1. Susan said

    I absolutely love this post.I tmade melaugh so hard I was crying. I love it becuase I can picture her looking at mom and dad with that look of but what is the big deal.

    Great post. You have such a way of writing that it creats a word picture.

  2. amy said

    It’ s not bad at all.;)
    The less laundry the better. I sometimes worry that I am turning my boys into “Hugh Hefner” types (minus the bunnies, of course), because I encourage them to just do school in their pajamas.;)

  3. Faith said

    As a transplant to Southern AZ a few years ago, I hear you.

    I loved this post so much. Probably because you are hilarious, but also because I have one of those nudist children.

    Glad I found your blog.

  4. Patti said

    not sure what the dress code is at church there, but would a sundress and bareleggedness in sandals be blasphemous? You could always put a bow in her hair to bring attention away from the offending skin showing on her legs and feet. Also, if the whole showing underware is an issue, sew her some cute bloomers (like the kind worn with babydoll pajamas) that she wears under her cotton sundress. C’mon, you know you SO would like to do the same!

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